Someone: "Science is a precise and exact thing with definite answers that everyone in the field agrees on"
Chemists: Haha no
Physicists: *maniacal laughing*
Linguists: *fistfighting each other whilst cackling like hyenas*
@norikawa anthropologists: *literally shooting at each other*
paleontologists: *doing the fistfighting and cackling thing*
archaeologists: yeah whatever, now will you please STOP BUILDING SHOPPING MALLS over the ruins of ancient cities, THANKS
@norikawa *Cries in Statistician*
@norikawa Sociologists: *start to cry*
@norikawa
"Does Science Advance One Funeral at a Time?"
"We study the extent to which eminent scientists shape the vitality of their areas of scientific inquiry by examining entry rates into the subfields of 452 academic life scientists who pass away prematurely.
....
Overall, our results suggest that once in control of the commanding heights of their fields, star scientists tend to hold on to their exalted position a bit too long."
@norikawa Biologists: "Wait I got turned around and forgot what the question was"
@norikawa Bioinformaticists:
Bioinformaticists:
...oh, they’re all on the roof smoking weed again, aren’t they...
@norikawa fucksake inorganic and organic chemists can't even agree who organometallics belong to 😅
@norikawa
I'm so happy to see linguistics included in the sciences, as it should be, and also as the most violent of these, 100% accurate. :)
Mathematicians: *look up in a daze, the shores of impossible lands glinting in their eyes and the language of madness upon their tongues* four people on earth can understand my research and i have no greater living enemies than they
@lizardmentsh @norikawa Computer "Science" majors after 5-10 years in industry:
[holds can of gas and lit match over every technological thing they've ever created. Sitting, pondering, neither throwing the match nor blowing it out.]
@lizardmentsh @norikawa ouch, too real
@norikawa The humanities, body of birds and heads of beautiful women: We're not so different, you and I
@norikawa
Biologists: *too busy brawling in the parking lot over taxonomy to hear the statement*
@norikawa
I'm literally, at this moment, reading a smackdown of minimalist grammar by a cabal of constraint based grammar advocating japanese linguists.
Its pretty heckin real.
@norikawa the difference between scientism and science. :)
If we go academic: "wut"
https://www.iflscience.com/editors-blog/an-anonymous-online-anime-fan-just-solved-a-problem-thats-been-eluding-mathematicians-for-decades/
@norikawa
dizzy 
, suspiciously
@norikawa
Statisticians: *currently dueling with slide rules over how to model their laughter*
@norikawa not even mathematicians have consensus on everything
@norikawa software engineers: *screams and yells at each other’s programming choices, while a bunch of js people are sobbing in a corner because their internet is not good enough to download the 1 GB node_modules needed for their hello world application*
@norikawa sociologists can’t even agree if they’re a science it’s fascinating