@julia Diagnosing a child always should be paired with teaching parents how to adjust their parenting style to help their child grow up. Only then we will change an opaque diagnosis into a solution.

@julia I'm not sure this cuts to the core of the issue. For me, the fact I was diagnosed with autism felt like scientific proof that I was stupid, weak, annoying, unlovable, etc.

@jellal oof of course yeah, that's only half the battle. A diagnosis is practically useless if it comes with false and unconstructive information about the thing being diagnosed

@julia This is so true. I struggled with this not just through childhood, but through a lot of adulthood as well... when I was diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, my mom said, "Yeah, you were diagnosed as a child, but they told us you'd grow out of it, so we didn't tell you." Man, if I'd been prepared properly, taught to develop coping mechanisms, really understood why I was "different" from other kids. This is why our kid has been involved in their treatment from the beginning.

@CarlCravens @julia

I got diagnosed a year back (at age 49) and *so* much stuff made sense.

When I told my parents, my step-mother said, "Yeah, your father has that too. He's fine, though."

So, um, thanks?

@CarlCravens @julia

I mean, I don't think they realized it while I was a child but for most of my life, I just thought I was lazy and undisciplined.

Even after I'd realized that there must be *something* different about my brain and found that treating it like a disability to be bypassed really helped, I still had days where I'd say, "Next week I'm going to get my ass in gear and not be like this."

The great thing about the diagnosis was that it made ADHD into a real thing I had to acknowledge.

@CarlCravens @julia

Also, "I can't do $THING right now, I'm lazy." is still a running gag in my household.

@julia it was decided that since i was 'gifted' that any disfunction or ways in which I was challenged was totally my fault. And then I found the diary my mom kept when I was 9, and it's a laundry list of ADHD/autism behaviors in me that she just wishes could be controlled or stopped.

@julia
Among adhd people its known as "the gifted Child problem" still, this Hits me Hard :(

mental health stuff, parenting (negative) 

Sign in to participate in the conversation
EFDN

The social network of the future: No ads, no corporate surveillance, ethical design, and decentralization! Own your data with Mastodon!